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Wednesday 29 March 2017

A dose of Empathy - helps design Life better

I had a placard in my room that read, "Please wear a smile while entering my space. It is part of the attire."  Most of us seem to have forgotten to smile. There is so much to smile for but we don't seem to appreciate that. We go through life with a long and serious face. I was wondering why this is so?

The spirit of giving, of being grateful for whatever we have, of just being cheerful and fun loving, of making a fool of yourself at times, at putting a smile in to the face of someone else, are all part of us. We need to just bring them out.

Why are only few able to bring it out? Empathy is the answer. Warren Buffet refers to the ovarian lottery. What he means is that if you are studying in a good school or college or your parents can afford to feed you, you are better off than 85% of the world. Would you trade your place for being born again? Most would not as the chances of being in the 85% is higher than the 15%. So, he recognises that those who have won the ovarian lottery should recognise that and do everything in their power to help those who have not. There will be some who have moved from the 85% to the 15%. These people will not only understand what it is to be in the 85% but also feel what it is to be in the 85%. So, they will definitely do their best to help the rest. This empathy is what will see the world go around with lesser and lesser of violence, terrorism, theft, murders, etc.

As Paul Parkin puts it beautifully, "Empathy is not about thinking that it is like a hat that we need to put on. Oh, someone is in distress, let me put on my empathy hat and punch in the empathy time. It is better that empathy is like the spectacles that we wear. It shapes the way we see things and connect to people and circumstances all the time. And when the other person also wears spectacles, the connection gets to the deepest level."

Bring it to the corporate world, and you will see empathy is now being seen as the key to all design principles - be that process, products, people related problems, customer problems, etc. Design Thinking focuses on empathy. Design Thinking knows that each one of us is born with the capability to empathize. However, it is left to us to cultivate it. Paul Parkin who did his research on empathy, put it beautifully - What is needed is the ability to observe a situation and forge communication that is inquisitive, non-judgemental, validating and compassionate. What this does is that it primarily changes us and the narrative that we end up having about others in ourselves. We look at others and the situations that they are, in the kindest way possible. 

If this world has to be a better place to live in, we need more and more of us to be empathetic. Unless, we find this aspect of our life, we will go through life without actually living it. As Dalai Lama puts it, "We need more humans to be kind rather than correct."


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