Climbing Mount Everest

She looked nervous and uncertain as she walked out of the interview room.  I turned around to talk to the Head of Human Resources (HR) when she suddenly re-entered the room and said, "Sir, I really need this job."  This was a lady who was trying to get a hold on her life. She had been abandoned by her husband a month after their wedding. She had waited for his return for 3 years, had been asked by her family not to come back to their home as she had chosen to marry against their wishes and was now going through divorce. The 3 years had shattered her confidence beyond belief.  She got up one day and decided that she needed to get back to "living". And for this, she needed a job.  She started searching for a job and that was when she came in for an interview.  This was someone trying to conquer a huge mountain in her mind. It was equivalent of climbing the tallest peak in the world - Mount Everest - probably, even higher.  The HR Head and I decided to give her a helping hand.

All of us have heard of or seen people who have faced significant odds in their lives to come through stronger.  We all may have even gone through such odds ourselves.  Every time we are faced with a difficult situation that seems impossible at that time, we need to remember that the impossibility or the huge mountain that we see in front of us is only in our mind's eye.  If we decide to remain positive and confident, the size of the mountain reduces gradually and we realize that there is flat land in front of us.

One of the biggest mountains that all of us faced as a child was deciding to walk. Each of us fell down so many times - we cried, we laughed...but, every time, we got up, dusted ourselves and tried walking again.  The same thing happened when we tried to learn talking. These were huge mountains for each of us, but we managed to climb them.  If we could do these when we were less than 3 years, why do we suddenly lose hope and confidence when we are much older and probably better equipped?

 

As we progress as a society and create more opportunities for ourselves, we need to focus on building mental resilience.  Mental resilience, as I see it, is nothing but the character that we build for ourselves. Character is again nothing but our personal values, our strengths, the skills that we have developed and the resources that we can pull out of our armoury apart from personal courage.  I bring up character because someone who nurtures this will have a strong sense of purpose, integrity, confidence and belief.  Taking accountability comes naturally to them. This also means that they will live down their mistakes and move on in lives - getting up quickly, dusting yourself and running after every fall.  This character building is essential for leaders.

 

Many studies have been done on societies that live under stress and what has helped them in coping with this stress.  A study done in Israel on how the society has coped with stress over the so many years of war and terrorism shows certain patterns - a feeling of personal security, social support and optimism reinforces resilience against symptoms of traumatic stress. Other research found that religious faith, ideology and strong social bonds also helped in building resilience.  So, while we focus and build on character, it is essential to live with strong social bonds.

 

As we have heard many say - It does not matter how many times you fall...what matters is how many times you stand up, shake it off and move forward. Also, what matters is how quickly are you willing to get up and run. When we do this, we realize that many a time we are faced with climbing Mount Everest, but always, it is our mind that decides whether we will conquer it or not.