Wishes and Goals

I am basing this blog on 3 quotes that I have really liked. Antoine de Saint-Exupery said, "A goal without a plan is just a wish." Steve Maraboli said, “If you have a goal, write it down. If you do not write it down, you do not have a goal - you have a wish." Zig Ziglar said, “The great majority of people are “wandering generalities” rather than “meaningful specifics”. The fact is that you can't hit a target that you can't see. If you don't know where you are going, you will probably end up somewhere else. You have to have goals.” 

 

How many times have you said or heard others say, "I wish I could do that" or "I have always wanted to do that or be like that or..."  The difference between a "wish" and "goal" is the ability and the willingness to make it a reality. The courage of conviction and being steadfast in what you want done, converts our wishes to goals.  It should also be accompanied by a lot of discipline.

 

I notice that life changing events typically cause such wishes to become goals.  Many of us go around talking of why we need to lose weight and actually do very little about it other than putting down few more ice-creams every week. Till such time we get in to a health issue. Then, all of a sudden, things fall in place. Why does this happen? It is because we are faced with an adversity and in the face of adversity, the best comes out in us. The situation also pushes us in to a tight corner.  We begin to lose weight, feel fantastic, the health issue begins to fade and, lo and behold, we are back to our old ways. Why does this happen? In my opinion, absolute lack of discipline. We, of course, blame it on lousy work hours, travel, etc. However, we are not sure how we made it happen when it really had to be done.  It comes down to discipline.

 

A goal is a wish that can come true. A goal can have a plan, you can think through how to make it happen, you can put some timeline and it may take more or less time than you thought it would and finally, if you put in hard work, it may just come true.

 

What happens when a wish comes in another form?  These are opportunities. They come and they go. We have to recognize them and, if they are in line with our goals, we need to grab them with both our hands. I had written earlier that luck is opportunity meeting preparedness - the right person at the right time, at the right place, with the right attitude and the right level of preparedness.  A wish can become a goal when there is "luck".

 

As you will see, for a wish to become a goal, there is always lot of hard work necessary. Hard work does not happen by chance. It needs will power and this is what I would call discipline.  Without that discipline, it becomes impossible for a wish to turn in to a goal.  Or, in other words, action converts a wish in to a goal and needs a lot of hard work and discipline.

 

So, how do we bring about action and discipline. The first thing to do is to write down your wish - "I want to lose weight". Now, also put down the why..."I want to feel healthy", "I want to feel lively", "I want to be brisk", "I want to look and feel good", etc. Once you start writing it down and reading it daily, your sub-conscious mind takes it in. The minute it is in to your sub-conscious mind, it helps the conscious mind to focus on it and convert it in to action.  Have you observed women walking around in a shopping mall? You will notice that a mom seems to be interested and looking for children clothing, toys, etc. Others who are not moms are looking for accessories, new clothes, personal care items.  This is how the sub-conscious mind works.  So, you can train the sub-conscious mind to think the way you want and the best way to do that is to put things down in writing.  That is why Steve Maraboli would have said, "If you have a goal, write it down....."

 

Just by writing it down, can you turn all your wishes in to goals? Not really. You need to know what you can do and what you cannot. I am reminded of a mail I received from a friend of mine. She said, "I read this book in which this person meets the lady of his life after many years. He had thought this lady had died. I was imagining how happy he would have felt seeing her after so many years. How I wish my husband was alive."  By putting this wish down in writing, can she make this a goal and get her dead husband back?  As I know of it now, I don't believe so.  So, whilst you must write down your wishes to convert them to goals, you must also realize that they are attainable - some with lots of hard work and perseverance over many years.

 

I got a message on my mobile from a very old friend of mine. She wrote, "Ravi, I have achieved my goal of getting my son to pass 10th grade. His teachers and doctors never believed this could happen. I so badly wanted it to happen and, finally, after 3 years, it has become a reality." This was a son who is a slow child and was struggling his way through school. 3 years ago, she decided to go part time and spend half a day with her son so that she could get him to pass the 10th grade exams. She needed a full time job but decided that she will cut back on her expenses and do with a part time job so that she could focus on her son. His future was more important to her. He was then in 7th grade. After 3 years of some real hard work, perseverance and belief and faith that she could do it, she has finally achieved it. 3 years ago she told me, "How I wish I can get him to pass his 10th grade exams." Her wish has come true and this is because of action combined with discipline and hard work.

 

I responded to her, "For those who do not believe that God exists, this is a fantastic example of how He worked through you to make your son go through these exams and pass them. He is there in each one of us, but we do not recognize Him. He actually shows Himself in different ways. This time, he has chosen to reveal Himself through you."